I was listening to the morning show on my favorite radio station and they were talking about dating in your marriage. They talked about the benefits of dating and if it was worth it or even possible. It got me to thinking about my own marriage.
We have been married for only 2 years but we have been living together for nearly 9. We have had our ups and downs, and when I say "downs" I mean into the depths of the abyss. Okay, okay, that is a little dramatic but we have had our problems.
I was talking to someone the other day, and I can't remember who, but probably my best bud Katy. It was made known to me that my relationship with my husband didn't start out the way most relationships do. I would say for the most part relationships are usually pretty happy and romantic for at least the first year. By the second year, it's still pretty good but a little rocky. By the third and maybe fourth year, your relationship might be suffering. Once you get through the fourth year it gets easier. That's of course, not always the case but from my point of view, from the people I know, this is pretty typical.
My relationship started out good for about a month. We spent the next four years in serious dislike of each other and bound and determined to keep it going anyways. We learned a lot about each other and came to realize that some things are just not worth being mad at. We still fight, but we do our best to forgive and forget.
Here are my 5 tips for a happy marriage that I have learned over the years based on my own relationship with my husband.
5. Don't hold grudges. Seriously, let it go. Don't let little things get in the way of being happy. Every month I get a little snappy. I usually need ice cream during that same time in the month. I know it drives my husband nuts. Probably as nuts as it drives me that he constantly leaves the cabinets in the kitchen open. But, we deal with it. We accept that we have flaws and we let it go. Why ruin a perfectly good day by getting aggravated unnecessarily?
4. Have date nights. At least once a month if you can. I know it's hard sometimes especially if you have kids. I don't have kids but I do have responsibilities as a caregiver and I am fully aware of the difficulty of getting away, but I think it is very important to actually get away.
3. Try to go to bed at the same time. My husband always winds down around seven in the bedroom. He watches the history channel and just relaxes before bed. I try to get in there around the same time. I goof off on the internet and we play with the dogs and talk about our day or just talk in general. It's good to stay connected with each other.
2. Have a financial budget. Once of the biggest stabs in a relationship is money problems. It puts a kink in just about every area of your relationship. Have a clear cut budget and stick to it so that a stupid thing like money doesn't get in the way of a happy marriage.
1. Stay intimate. Not just in the sack. (That's a romantic way of putting it isn't it?) Hug each other. Kiss each other. Say I love you. Humans need physical contact and if you and your spouse rarely touch then chances are that isn't the only problem in your relationship.
These things have helped our own relationship and maybe it will help you too.
Leave comments below and check out my website. www.projecthousewife.com
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